This morning started off like any other…I was in the shower by 6:15 so that I could be ready to go for a 7AM call for work. Since AJ is usually awake by around 6:30 (though we don’t go in and get her until around 7), if I have an early call like that I usually take it out in the car. Crazy, I know, but it works. Also, I try to let the dogs out before the day gets started, lest they decide to relieve themselves in our bathroom (where they sleep…crazy, I know, but it works).
After I was done showering, but before I finished getting ready for work, I decided to let the dogs out. Since AJ was still sleeping, and in order to maximize quietness in the house, I decided to let the dogs out onto the driveway side of the house and then into the backyard (note: the driveway side door is MUCH quieter than the door to the backyard, which squeaks like a crazy person who squeaks a lot). Brilliant? I thought so…
Until the dogs bolted down the driveway and into the street and then down the street. I bolted after them and at 6:30 in the morning, wet hair and all, I found myself sprinting down the street yelling after the dogs. They finally heard me and slowly came to a stop, turned around, and followed me back into the yard and subsequently, into the fenced in backyard. Whew!
Ok. That was done, and after catching my breath, I finished getting ready for work and started the coffee so that I could sip on it in the car during my work call. At about 5 minutes to 7, I started getting ready for the call: I fixed my coffee and moved my computer and cell phone out to the car. I decided to make 2 trips (one with tech gear and one with coffee), because I didn’t want to risk trying to juggle coffee + computer + phone + headset all in 1 trip. I know myself well enough to know that I’m clumsy. On that first trip out, I for some reason decided not to close the side door all the way. After all, I was just going to go right back through it to get my coffee.
Well, after putting my gear into the car, I made my way back up the steps (all two of them!), when suddenly my flip flop slipped off of my foot, propelling me forward into the door…only the door swung open and CRASHED into the wall as my face scraped its way down to the gravel. Every attempt I made at catching myself on the way down only resulted in worsening the fall, and I wound up face down on the steps/gravel (see below for a picture of the crime scene).
Amar, who had been sleeping, came barreling into the entryway to see what had just happened. I asked him if I was bleeding from my head, and he indicated that all seemed to be well. Only then did I realize that the makeup I had just applied was now smeared on the inside of my glasses. Yes, that’s how hard my face smacked into the cold, hard earth.
After recovering from Event 2, I started my work call and began catching up on email. I had been working with a colleague on a presentation a few weeks ago…a widely circulated presentation. I had an email from her indicating that the version we had been using had a typo. Instead of saying “Critical IP Assets” our deck said “Critical IP Asses”. Yep. Awesome.
After finally getting my act together and deciding to head into the office, I went out to the car to load my stuff and get the heck outta Dodge. Dodge had not been good to me so far. Upon opening the door, a large spider crept across the driver’s seat and disappeared into the back seat somewhere. I grabbed a crumpled up newspaper from the passenger seat (yes, I keep my car clean, people!), and I smashed the paper around for a few minutes in hopes of scaring my 8 legged friend out into the open. Nope. Couldn’t find him. He’s camped out somewhere in my car now just waiting for me to return.
I spent 10 minutes on the road today dialed into a conference call that had been canceled. Only I didn’t know it was canceled until someone else dialed in and told me. Winner.
It started raining on my way to work.
Dear Month of May: is this really how you’re going to play it? Showing all your cards on day 1? Well, good luck with that buddy. Slow and steady wins the race, and that’s just how I plan to play it. It’s a marathon, not a sprint.
Dear April – goodbye, and don’t let the door it you in the arse on the way out.
Seriously, is anyone else glad to get into May? Not (only) for the sake of getting closer to Christmas, but for the sake of getting the heck outta the perfect storm that was April. Don’t get me wrong, not everything in April was bad. I had my fair share of tasty desserts, a freakin’ awesome steak, and a weekend get-away in a 15 star hotel.
So no, it wasn’t all bad.
But I also had too many conversations that started with “I don’t know how to tell you this, but…” than I care to remember (directed AT me, not delivered BY me). Never have I felt more beat up by life than I have over the last 30 days. Sure, when we were trying to have a baby a few years back, I felt pretty beat up by life. But that was all focused on one specific thing: getting a baby in my belly.
This? This is like a George Bush thousand-points-of-light speech gone awry….turned into a thousand points of complete insanity.
Get thee behind me, April!
More details later with the goodies that May has already brought my way….stay tuned!!